John Henry was a great man.

It does not seem so long ago that I sat and wrote about Albert Rowen and all the wonderful things I discovered about him as he passed away. Tonight I write again with a new death of another grandfather freshly on my mind. John Henry - my mother's father - passed away tonight. Nobody awoke this morning expecting the day to end without him, but it did.

As I sat in the hospital room with a lot of my family, knowing it was only a matter of a few hours before he would pass - Emily Dickinson flooded my mind. With Albert, death stopped kindly, but with John, it was another poem that struck me. Dickinson wrote a poem called "I heard a fly buzz when I died." In it, the person passing looked around the room at the family all gathered waiting for them to pass. There was that feeling in the room tonight. We could do nothing but wait. We waited in silence, we waited remembering all the wonderful times we had with John, waited while watching the Vikings lose... but mostly waited until his suffering would cease.

Earlier this week I had the blessing to talk to grandpa and the last thing he said to me was that he was glad I was here. Me too. Although it was hard to be there in that hospital room - I knew that there was nowhere else in the world I wanted to be then. He died so peacefully and with so much dignity and respect and love - just as he wanted. His family was there to the end. I'm glad I could be there. He was always so worried that I wouldn't come back home to South Dakota. Everytime I went away he always wanted me to come home - and I have.

Tonight I lost my grandpa - but I look forward to the day when he will have a new body and perhaps he will dance with me.

A Message from the Heartland

Greetings to all! I hope you all had a wonderful Christmas and are looking forward to the new year. Since I am a student, I do not really think of January as the beginning of a new year, but rather September. January is more like the middle of my year - maybe someday that will change.

This Christmas I received a webcam as one of my gifts. I wanted it mainly to chat with a few friends and to be able to "see" my family during the long stretches I am away from home.

I also wanted to leave a message for all of you.

A Quiet Desperation

I was going to wait to post when I was finished with everything. Tonight I realized if I were to wait that long, whatever it was that I would write on here, I could just tell most of you face to face.

People are starting to leave for break. A few of my friends have made the trip to Georgia, to Delaware, to Oklahoma, to New York, to wherever. Those of us left are consumed by the stack of work left to do prior to our own departures. My stack is not really a stack of work, rather it is a stack of books I am using to write my final paper. I have not been stressed at the end of this semester as I have been by other semesters. ( I am primarily thinking of the two: the semester prior to England and my last semester of undergrad.) Apparently I have developed enough self discipline to manage my workload. Most days I feel I have no self discipline because I often watch movies or talk to people on the phone for extended periods of time. However, the end of the semester has come and I only have one paper to finish while my friends with similar class schedules have two papers and finals to complete.

It snowed here on Thursday. While the snow in the trees is lovely, I was a little perturbed by its timing. I was supposed to attend a concert at my church Thursday night featuring one of the church choir members who has an amazing tenor voice. The concert and the potluck before it was canceled due to the weather so instead I drove back to campus in the snow. It was the first time I drove up "the hill" while the road was somewhat slippery and snow-packed. That was an adventure. The road is at a pretty good incline and it curves around the hill. I have a little car so I have to really gun it in order to make it up hills in the snow. The whole way up the hill I alternated between pressing and letting up the gas. Pressing the gas lunged me up the hill while letting up would slightly turn my car around the curve. This technique, while a bit dubious, did get me up the hill.

Today I decided to dig my car out the parking lot so I could make it to church on time tomorrow. Someone told me it was supposed to snow again tonight. Oh well. At least there won't be as much snow on it in the morning.

The paper I am writing is about how the concept of community is connected with the image of God. How people can only truly reflect God when they are in community with him and with other people. We can only be true to ourselves when we define who we are in light of God and in light of those around us.

I am a creation of God Almighty.
I am the daughter of Les and Shirley.
I am the sister to Dan and Machelle.
I am the aunt to Randi, Jacob and Elizabeth.
I am a friend to many.
I am a church secretary to Immanuel Church.
I am a student to the Gordon-Conwell faculty.
The list goes on...

Who are you?

The Inevitable Tunnel

During my correspondence with some of you, I have likened this next period of research to a dark tunnel. I am now about to enter that tunnel, not to see the light until the 18th when I embark on my trip home for Christmas.

I like this imagery for so many reasons. For one - I will be holed up in what amounts to a cave also known as my room (I might try the library which has the affectionate nickname of "the catacombs" around here.) I will submerge myself in a lifestyle of intense reading, thinking, criticizing, praising and writing. Other necessities become secondary in such a lifestyle. I own a movie called "IQ" which is a romantic comedy and one of the characters must pretend to be this great academic - a great thinker. So what does he do? He messes up his hair, doesn't care if his clothes match, uses a rope for a belt, etc. This stereotype comes from the academic stuck in the tunnel. The person who sees no light - who does not feel the warmth of accomplishment and love awaiting them on the outside.

The other reason I love this imagery so much is that Christmas becomes the light at the end of the tunnel. Yes, Christmas. On a side (but very interesting note) is that Hanukkah started on Wednesday. Hanukkah is the Jewish festival of lights. Coincidence? I don't think so.

After a long year of toil and separation from the ones you love, Christmas is the light at the end of the tunnel. To look on an even grander scale - the coming of the Christ-child was the light and the end of a very long tunnel for the Jewish nation, and really for the whole world. Advent could be considered the season of the tunnel. The season of advent is a time where we must face the truth - we need a savior. It is as true of us as it was of the Jews in the Old Testament. The difference is our tunnel is lit on both ends. We look back to see the Christ child and we look forward to see the light of the risen Lord who will come again.

This week as I enter this small tunnel of research I am thankful for the light I see at the end. I am thankful for the family and friends who show me love in all kinds of wonderful ways. I am thankful for the education I am receiving and have received. I am thankful for the God, who no matter where I am in life, will never forsake me.

And, on a lighter note. I found a way to post some pictures so here is a closer look at the fun I've had in Boston.

Just a Quick Note

One thing about writing something on the internet is that I really don't know if people are reading it - if they are enjoying it or what. I've decided to do something that might turn out to be very stupid, in which case I will change my mind again. I have made it possible for anyone to comment on my blog and please do so. I would love to know who is following my adventure. So please feel free to leave a little note!

First Snowfall of the Season

For those of you at home in South Dakota, you might think I am a few days late in my posting. However, we, here in MA, got our first real snowfall last night. Needless to say some of the students from southern areas of the country find this experience quite thrilling. The snow is that really wet, really heavy type. I'm happy about that because it will be easy to clean off my car and I could still wear a sweatshirt to class without a coat.

I took some pictures - just so you believe me. Not that anyone would really doubt it, though.

A view from the Kerr Building.



I told you it was that slushy wet kind of snow.



It's melting really fast. Hopefully some of it stays so it isn't a sloppy mess here.